Valerie (Kate Abbruzzese) and Kyle (Brooks Brantly) face marital difficulties as Mia (Georgia Waehler) watches in (un)conditional (photo by Russ Rowland)
(UN)CONDITIONAL
SoHo Playhouse
15 Vandam St. between Varick St. & Sixth Ave.
Wednesday – Monday through October 26, $41-$72
www.sohoplayhouse.com
Ali Keller’s (un)conditional is an awkward, uncomfortable theatrical experience that will have you squirming in your seat, but not in a good way.
The ninety-minute play, continuing at SoHo Playhouse through October 26, is a decidedly adult look at sexual fantasy involving two couples. For their tenth anniversary, Valerie (Kate Abbruzzese) has convinced Kyle (Brooks Brantly) to participate in a robber-rapist role-play scenario in order to reinvigorate their love life, but when she reveals herself wearing a purple strap-on dildo and tells him what she wants to do with it, he freaks out. It gets even more complicated when they discover that their seven-year-old daughter, Mia (Georgia Waehler), has been listening at the door.
Valerie and Kyle have a brutal fight about each other’s needs, Valerie explaining that she has been feeling neglected for a long time. “You could’ve just told me you felt like that. You didn’t need to do all this. You are more than a bunch of holes, Val,” Kyle explains, holding her hand. Valerie replies, “I know.” Kyle clarifies, “I mean to me. You are more than a bunch of holes to me.” Valerie rips her hand away and declares, “This is not about you. It’s about me and something I want.”
In another part of town, Lenox (Annalisa Chamberlin) is making steak and potatoes for her husband, the somewhat older Hank (Nathan Darrow), in order to reinvigorate their love life and have children. “Even though I don’t like steak and potatoes as much as you like steak and potatoes, I know that you’ll get that look on your face where you’re all excited, and I know you’ll enjoy yourself and it makes me like steak and potatoes more than I normally would,” she says demurely, slyly letting him know that she will do everything she can to get him back in the sack, which he has been avoiding like the plague.
Valerie decamps to her parents’ house for a while; when Kyle takes Mia to the store to buy Halloween costumes, they bump into Lenox, Kyle’s coworker, and Hank, who quickly bonds with Mia. Behaving like a whiny brat, Mia insists that her father get her a pretzel — a metaphor for the twisted relationships becoming apparent among the five characters — but when she acts out, Hank puts on a magician outfit and magically makes the obnoxious girl happy.
He also makes himself happy; after Kyle and Mia leave, Lenox says to Hank, “Maybe we don’t need miracles. I told you role play would work. Let’s get the magician costume.”
Eventually everyone comes together at one of the most absurd New Year’s Eve parties ever, featuring a plot twist that elicited an enormous groan from the audience the night I went.
Lenox (Annalisa Chamberlin) and Hank (Nathan Darrow) face marital difficulties in (un)conditional (photo by Russ Rowland)
The ninety-minute (un)conditional is about as icky a show as I’ve seen for quite some time. There are a few good moments — the early dildo scene is poignant and hilarious — but director Ivey Lowe is unable to smooth out the bumps, both in the narrative, which ranges from ridiculously silly to darkly serious as it jumps from holiday to holiday, and the constant set changes, as white furniture is transformed between beds and couches while interstitial music shifts from cool rocking guitar and bass to more maudlin instrumentals. Given the uneven dialogue, the cast does what it can, although Waehler, who is twenty, portrays Mia in a ceaselessly annoying manner.
Winner of SoHo Playhouse’s 2024 Lighthouse Series for emerging talent in New York City, (un)conditional gets off to a rousing start but goes limp too soon and never recovers its mojo.
[Mark Rifkin is a Brooklyn-born, Manhattan-based writer and editor; you can follow him on Substack here.]